Is it rude to pour your own drink in Korea?
Around elders, your boss or people you have just met, yes, it can come across as a little rude. Among close friends your own age, most Koreans won't mind at all, and plenty of younger people fill their own glass without a second thought.
Pouring for yourself even has a name, 자작 (jajak, "pouring your own drink"), and it stands out because a Korean table works the other way around. Everyone keeps an eye on everyone else's glass: when yours is empty, someone fills it, and when theirs is empty, you return the favor. Grabbing the bottle just to top up your own glass can look like you are drinking alone in the middle of the group, or quietly hinting that nobody is looking after you. The same look-after-each-other logic shows up at the grill, too: among the unwritten rules of Korean BBQ, the youngest person usually offers to cook the meat for the whole table. There is even a half-joking superstition that pouring your own glass brings bad luck to the person sitting across from you, or, in another version, keeps them single for years. Nobody really believes it, but someone will usually bring it up with a grin.
With older people the rules get firmer. You pour for them with two hands, receive with two hands and let them pour for you. We walk through the whole routine, from turning your head to sip to why nobody tops off a half-full glass, in our guide to drinking with elders in Korea.
Things are loosening up, though. Drinking alone, 혼술 (honsul, "solo drinking"), is completely ordinary now, and some Koreans argue that pouring for yourself is actually the healthier habit, since everyone sets their own pace instead of being carried along by refill after refill.
If your glass is empty and you would like more, the smoothest move is to pour for someone else first. They will almost always pick up the bottle and fill yours in return. With friends, you can simply laugh and say you'll pour your own. And if you would rather stop, leave a little in your glass: as long as it isn't empty, nobody will refill it.
